I recently had a conversation that made me rethink some things I thought I wanted and some of the people I felt I wanted around.
In this one life that we live, we are going to do and experience right and wrong. There will come a time in our lives when we all will do right and will do wrong. The thought of the week for me; I don’t want to be around any person that swears they have done no wrong ever. That’s not even realistic in life.
It’s so much talk about “vibes” “energy” and “protecting peace” but there are people out there that post all that and never see the error in their own ways and actions. Maybe your energy is being affected because of the way you talk to people. Maybe the vibe is different for you because people are tired of you looking at everybody else but yourself for all your internal and external issues and shortcomings. Maybe your peace isn’t protected because you’re moving different, keeping secrets, looking funny in the light and you’re not as 100 as you think you are. Even if you’re on point 85% of the time; The 15% still counts against you. No one is exempt from that basic math.
Not everything can be fixed with an apology. The action of changed behavior is always needed and respected more; But when you encounter a person that absolves themselves from any and all error and wrong doing; It may be best to leave them in their own ignorant bliss.
It’s been a rough few weeks if I’m being honest. I have a really big and tough decision to make and no matter what I’m going to lose something. What’s wild is, I didn’t think the loss would feel like this.
I’m mentally behaving out of character. I am not who I need to be right now. I am in somewhat of a daze and I need to get my peace of mind in order. I’ve been praying, meditating and somedays I feel good. Others, not so much. I guess that’s how reality is. Any moment of any day you can go from a an extreme high to an instant low. You may feel so down that you can’t get back up. What’s definite is that it’s all for a reason. A better purpose that you can’t see. A greater good that is not recognizable at the moment.
In my heart, I know I’m doing the right thing. Sometimes you got to do the right thing even if it means doing it all on your own. Maybe I wasn’t as unhappy as I thought I was. Maybe I just adjusted to a routine. Maybe my decision with action will be the defining moment of clarity.
I pray that it is.
So subliminal and bold
All the energy switch
First time I truly felt like, Fuck This Bitch
I don’t need this shit
I just need to relax
Cause I ain’t missing out on nothing
I can’t get right back
Oh so you all that?
I could never do better?
The worst moments of your life were when WE were together?
Bitch that sounds kind of clever
But it really ain’t facts
I probably missed something greater
Cause I didn’t text back
It’s women not talking to me
Cause they didn’t get your chance
Some just wanted the pipe
And I ain’t take that dance
But that’s just my bad
Trying to do something different
Building animosity cause I’m deprived of my wishes
And the man that I should be is not apart of your vision
So fuck it…
Let me see what’s up with some other chicks then