Writing Pages…

I’m writing pages to a book that I shouldn’t release
But to keep it bottled in is a disservice to me
Perfection is a suit I’ve never purchased for me
I just want the feeling of freedom in a moment to breathe

Exhaling the bull, I prepare to take charge
Living in a rush, like I could ever lap God
Tense because the world has given me a new guard
Love that I survived cause black life is real hard

I’m writing pages to a book that I shouldn’t release
I’m going to do some things many wouldn’t believe
Help or Hurt? Yes, and a change you may see
Maybe the pages won’t publish, but I can not delete

Sorry Y’all: Thoughts From My Recliner

So man! It’s been a minute right? I’ve been trying to stay off of my public safe space because I’ve been in several moods and emotions and to be real; It’s not quite ready for even my public safe space yet.

I’m still thinking about my grandma. I have new thoughts about my personal life. I have a new mindset on self care. It’s a lot going on in my mind to say the absolute least. I’m going to try and pump out a little art to y’all though. Maybe a few writings will help me get back into a better mental space.

Hope everybody is taking the quarantine seriously. At the same time I hope blacks and latinos aren’t co-signing every word that is being said about us and the coronavirus on the news. Always keep in your mind we as a delegation went from “Black folks can’t catch the coronavirus” to the news now telling us 50% of all coronavirus deaths are black people. That’s not some coincidental news to me. AmeriKKKa has been capitalizing off of Black Fear for a long time. Don’t think they wouldn’t do it during a pandemic.

Whether you are staying busy or just staying safe, good for you. Don’t get wrapped up in people telling you what you got to do or work on right now. You supposed to do you. That’s the only thing that matters right now. As long as you are doing that, all will remain well.

Well, Let me attempt to tell my life colorfully so I can relax and finally get into Snowfall.

Be Safe, wear mask and wash your entire body thoroughly…and your clothes. Love!

My Daddy Goal

I believe it was two years ago. I typed a goal/affirmation down in my phone that simply said,

“I’m going to hug my daughter everyday”

I have not achieved that goal, yet. I think that not achieving this goal has lead to my indescribable incomplete feeling. With the passing of my grandma and how important she was to both of us, I really have to do all I can to achieve that goal.

Making a living was hard enough before the pandemic. For many it will become even harder. Relocating is a task within itself, but the distance we are apart would make daily travel very expensive and unrealistic. I have some real decisions to make, even if temporary. I know the great relationship I have with my daughter could be greater. It’s on me to push it to that level. This is a decision less about me and more about her and us. In this crazy time we are living in, I don’t want to be far from my child. I don’t want to have to finance a trip to see her. I don’t want her adolescent years with me to be sporadic and heavy technology based. As her father, it’s on me to fix that reality in every aspect anyway I can.

I will fulfill my Daddy goal of hugging my daughter everyday. It’s a must.