If it holds your mind, speak from your heart.
Don’t stifle your tongue with a word someone may need
That person in need may be you…
Don’t run from the love in your heart
Stand still and let it knock you unconscious into clarity
Understand your love and it’s energy
Challenge it to be what you need
Control your loving energy and deliver until a feel of peace

If it’s on your heart relish in the thought
The release of that feeling to beam while it’s dark
Turn that feeling into clear thought
And express with no halt
Understand what you feel, accept it and deal
Break way from the chains of suppressed ideas

Be who you are. What you are is what you feel.
Express without yield
Thoughts from the heart forever real

So I Been Reading About Semen Retention

Earlier this year, I got a chance to check out a book called, “The Way of The Superior Man”. I found it very enlightening for a few life reasons. In that book, I got a chance to evaluate myself, my circumstance and things I honestly didn’t like about myself. Listening to that book let me know that I can change on a level greater than I ever imagined and I can start putting in the work at anytime and the results will show.

In the book, there is a lot of “mastery of self” talk mental as well as physical. There’s even chapters about ejaculating up your spine and the powerful benefits that come with “not cumming.” When I first read it, I was like, “Eh! I like to get my nut off whether with a woman or with standard masturbation and I’m not changing that.” A revisit to the book in September had me thinking, “Do I have the power in me to not ejaculate even during sex?” It’s a wild concept and I have been giving it more thought the last couple weeks.

For the last 3 maybe 4 years, I have been seeing post on “No Nut November” and the “No Fap” movement which I educated myself on and it’s interesting. I didn’t realize “No Fap” was actually geared to help people with porn addiction and other sexual natured vices and “controls”. I didn’t dig too deep on it, because that’s not what I was really looking for, but I will check out more on it soon. No Nut November is self explanatory. In November, “I’m not masturbating”. No need to elaborate on that. What I was looking for was info on Semen Retention.

Semen Retention sounded like everything the book was telling me. The mastery and control of man and his seed. His genitals and how he uses it and when. There’s not a lot of “scientific fact” on this anywhere, but the internet is flooded with testimony. Men across the world who may be single or in relationships have stopped masturbating or have engaged in sexual activity without actual standard ejaculation. I got intrigued because I have had those moments where I just don’t cum and I’m good. Performance is confirmed successful and I’m satisfied with the outcome on my end as well. I’ve never purposely done it or “found another way to release” though. It’s an interesting challenge and I’m going to prepare myself to start taking it on.

For the Super TMI portion of this post, I’ve been masturbating at a frequency that is way beyond what I desire and I want to stop. So I will. I’m using this month to start my new journey into a life without masturbation. I want to experiment with my physical in ways many won’t. It’s honestly easy to “get that nut off” versus not doing it, channeling that energy and putting it to work for you in another capacity.

To provide an example; When I write with sexual fueled urge and desire, I create beautiful scenarios and the color of my language seems to peak, no matter the topic, but especially when describing women, sex or just wanting people to connect and feel. On the flip, masturbation has definitely stalled the process of a book I’m writing. When I reach my point of no return a lot of vision releases along with that moment of self gratification. So I want to change and channel that if possible.

My big fear is, how will I keep my focus? Sometimes, I would masturbate just to clear the lust out of my mind or to not say or do something stupid. For a good portion of my life, masturbation has stopped me from making stupid or terrible mistakes. Those mistakes weren’t frequent and consistent, but they definitely provided clarity during potentially disastrous times. From what I’ve been reading, I’m supposed to take those moments and put them into something like my writing, lifting weights or some form of expression or action and just not ejaculating and letting that energy dissipate with no benefit to me. Sounds easy, but man and both of his heads can be difficult to control.

I’m taking this day by day, week to week and hope to get to a month strong in every aspect of the word. It’s been a long time since I can say I have “never masturbated” so this is a great challenge ahead of me. I look forward to the journey and the results. Will I become a master of Semen Retention? My answer right now, “If it leads to the ultimate master of self and destiny; Yes.”

If you do or have done this before, I’m curious to know about your journey. Why did you start or stop? How long did it take for you to master this? How did it impact your life? Any dialogue you can provide is appreciated.


Because none of that shit matters. None of it.
Mentally it’s 2020 for me.
I have changed and adapted. Added new elements to my lifestyle.
The need to be active on Social Media is nonexistent.
I don’t have that old job that requires fake things.
I don’t want to play the game or join the crowd
I still suck at being phony and I’m done reaching out.
My escape is a pen, a keyboard and the world beyond WiFi
Drinking to cope or forget is no longer apart of me.
My expression of love, praise and gratitude is greater.
I still feel hate, disdain and loathe people, places and things.
I’m not interested in being perfect, nice or real.
My concern is being me. Cam.
A man of constant thoughts feelings and emotions.
A person motivated by his past to presently make a greater future.
Someone who uses the word Friend like Family.
Loving unconditionally. Caring uncontrollably. Fighting infinitely.
Cam. Finding me, Becoming me and evolving me at the same damn time.
Loving the right doing of my wrongs and fearless in my truth.
The privately open book. The close friends journal.
The resource who often wonders.
Doing what I wish on my terms.
That hater of small talk but can converse for hours.
A person of high faith. A creator. A human truly being.
One who disappears in a quest to recharge energy.
We can talk forever but not today.
But I’ll do anything and make anytime for “You”
To love me and to hate me is to agreed I’m still the same dude.

But You Could Die…

If you keep waiting till the year change, you could die.
Spirit wondering what could have been as your lifeless body lies.
Wishing you wouldn’t have waited since no man or woman knows their time.
A memory, an RIP, a teary-eyed goodbye…

If you wait till the ball drops then you drop to your knees…
Clutching your heart, stopping the party, a face of grit in sheer agony
What will the rest of your year be? Will it even be?
Are you really going to wait and see?
Your “soon I’ll start” mission no longer your destiny…

Your new year is now. Create your wanted season of change.
Be what you want, be what you saw and foreseen today.
Cause you can make plans for next week
And die before the end of today.
How long will you wait? Cause you didn’t plan to die today.

Image by DarkWorkX from Pixabay