I ask God for a lot. I ask for so many things that sometimes I feel like I’m not even saying real prayers or taking time to be truly thankful for what I do have. What I also noticed is how God has moved in a way for me to achieve. The way he is doing it is through creating time.
Somedays my phone doesn’t ring or alert at all if it isn’t my wife. Somedays I’m literally sitting in my chair thinking of “what needs to be done today”. I also can think of an idea and have just enough to start. It’s all rooted in available time.
Social media and it’s notifications are all optional. Even more time provided. I can now say that in a lot of ways on more days than I am happy to say, I’ve had enough time to reach or achieve a lot of the things I’ve asked God for and haven’t made the most of that time. It proved to me that my focus isn’t as great as I want it to be. October has been a month of enlightening and now I much continue to make the most of that enlightenment. Moving in to 2020, I won’t be the same person I was in 2019 and I will be worlds away from who I was in 2010.
I stood in the mirror today and thought to myself, I love who I’m becoming. I had no clue how much self love I lacked. It’s beyond “not being suicidal”. Are you happy with your life? Your look? Your health? Your body? Your hairstyle? Your career? Your job? Your friends? The information you receive? All of it is an extension of self love. I’m becoming more in love with myself and my progress everyday. It’s causing me to push harder and gain new and great information to help me.
God has removed so many things, devices and people out of my way so I can see all that. Now it’s on me to maximize God’s provided time. Thank you, God.
Image by engin akyurt from Pixabay
This weekend, I let myself down. I let another human being, take me off my square. That person got me out of my aura and energy and took control of some of that along with my focus and time. I hate myself for that. I can’t believe I let that happen. It just proves I still got more growing to do. I’m elevating to a higher frequency and it wasn’t until this issue was complete that I realized how much of a low vibration it brought me to.
I absolutely can not let any human being have more control over my focus, energy and my time than I do. I can’t be overly consumed with another persons actions. I can control me. Not anyone one else on earth. I hate some of my thoughts and actions this weekend. I hate who I allowed myself to be and who it was for, but I’ve beat myself up about it enough. Now, we move forward. I don’t know if I passed this test, but even in failure, I learned. It will get even harder to steal my joy, my focus and my time.
The next test will be a breeze!
I been up thinking about time.
How my time is used.
How I may force time on some.
How some don’t make time for me.
I really don’t know how to capitalize off of everything I can do right now and where, I just know it’s not doing it there…
That was what I said last night in a conversation with a good friend as I talked about next moves and the music and entertainment industry. I think what’s best for me is to pursue my thoughts and aspirations on my own. At least I know that way the effort, success and failure are all on me. I don’t think the “cutting edge company that will let me be me” exist. I can’t be stifled or boxed in. I got to get all these visions out.
I won’t say I wasted time, but I am careful with my next ticks.
I believe I can, so I will…